How To Manage Your Anger

“Now the Passover of the Jews was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. And He found in the temple those who sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the money changers doing business.  When He had made a whip of cords, He drove them all out of the temple, with the sheep and the oxen, and poured out the changers’ money and overturned the tables. And He said to those who sold doves, “Take these things away! Do not make My Father’s house a house of merchandise!” Then His disciples remembered that it was written, “Zeal for Your house has eaten Me up.” — John 2:13-17

Have you ever heard someone use Jesus as an excuse as to the rightness of their being angry. I have.  It is a case of finding justification for sin.  Sin you say? Yes. In the Temple Jesus was honoring God by clearing the Temple of carnality – vain religion.  The religious leaders had allowed things that should not be as a means to an end – the end justifying the means. Jesus said no. I would suggest to you that what Jesus did was not permanent – that as soon as He left – the tables were set back up and everyone got back to “business” as usual. But to say that Jesus was angry and took it out on those people – well I think that is not correct. 

With respect to anger, I suppose you have to define what you think anger is.  The Cambridge dictionary says it is “a strong feeling that makes you want to hurt someone or be unpleasant because of something unfair or unkind that has happened” Jesus did not want to hurt someone – He wanted to honor God and make a point to the people.  It was about the sin and not the sinner. For most of us – it is both.  We have a hard time separating the two.  The feelings that rise up in us when we become angry have nothing to do with honoring God and exposing sin. What Jesus did was really about a spiritual problem – He used what people could see to make the point. (Read the next few verses to see His next point to the religious leaders.)

When I was in my first command in the Army, my First Sergeant told me that the soldiers who were brought before me for non-judicial punishment because of some violation of the Uniform Code of Military Justice did not know that I was serious because I spoke in an even tone. They were in trouble but did not know it because of my demeanor. So I would raise my voice – maybe stand up from my chair (they were standing at attention). Maybe even lean forward on my desk. When they left my office, I would look at the First Sergeant and ask “How did I do?” and he would say “Great Sir, I think he understands you are not pleased.”  I was making a point – displaying emotion – but without the emotion.

So – anger – the anger that so many struggle with comes from the heart – I have heard it called a “secondary” emotion. In other words – there is something behind the emotion – frustration, disappointment, failure, a past hurt.  Pastor Rick Warren said that “Hurt people, hurt people.” For those who are in a place of authority – vocationally – like at your job – or relationally – like being a parent – it is easy to abuse that authority – to use it as a hammer – against someone who has done something that you are not happy about. (Know anyone like that?)

“‘Be angry, and do not sin’: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil. Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need. Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” —Ephesians 4:27-32

How can you be angry and not sin – again define anger – it is possible to have righteous indignation (to be angry) and not sin – purely Spiritual. Sin is born in the heart and comes from our fallen nature. I think that 99.9% of the anger that we show towards others has nothing to do with honoring God and everything to do with us, personally. And we would like to justify it by pointing to Jesus in the Temple or what Paul wrote to the Church in Ephesus. So you cling to “Be angry and do not sin” then what do you do with “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you” Seems contradictory doesn’t it? I think it sounds like Jesus – the One in Whose image God the Father is conforming us.

So how do you manage your anger? You don’t.  You let the Spirit of God, who is in you, do it. “do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption”

Think about it – Pray about it - Believe it – Walk in it. Let your light shine and give God the glory.

By Faith Alone By His Grace Alone And For His Glory Alone