What To Do When A Friend Hurts Your Heart

My Utmost For His Highest 

"…I am with you to deliver you," says the Lord. —Jeremiah 1:8

{CHAMBERS} “God promised Jeremiah that He would deliver him personally— “…your life shall be as a prize to you…” (Jeremiah 39:18). That is all God promises His children. Wherever God sends us, He will guard our lives. Our personal property and possessions are to be a matter of indifference to us, and our hold on these things should be very loose. If this is not the case, we will have panic, heartache, and distress. Having the proper outlook is evidence of the deeply rooted belief in the overshadowing of God’s personal deliverance. The Sermon on the Mount indicates that when we are on a mission for Jesus Christ, there is no time to stand up for ourselves. Jesus says, in effect, “Don’t worry about whether or not you are being treated justly.” Looking for justice is actually a sign that we have been diverted from our devotion to Him. Never look for justice in this world, but never cease to give it. If we look for justice, we will only begin to complain and to indulge ourselves in the discontent of self-pity, as if to say, “Why should I be treated like this?” If we are devoted to Jesus Christ, we have nothing to do with what we encounter, whether it is just or unjust. In essence, Jesus says, “Continue steadily on with what I have told you to do, and I will guard your life. If you try to guard it yourself, you remove yourself from My deliverance.” […] We put our common sense on the throne and then attach God’s name to it. We do lean to our own understanding, instead of trusting God with all our hearts (see Proverbs 3:5-6).”

{ELGIN} I just had a long conversation with someone yesterday about this very thing.  Unjust treatment from someone very close to their heart.  There is nothing that hurts so deeply as betrayal by someone you love and trust.  So what do you do with that?  Certainly there is sorrow … but we should not be surprised.  Do not look to the world .. even to those closest to you for affirmation .. look to the hills (Psalm 121:1). When it happens to us, our first response is to try and think of a way to fix it .. to find restoration … the problem is that it is not your problem.  It is the one who betrayed your trust that must repent .. you can’t coax them into it . .talk them into it … pummel them with scriptural reasons why they should not be that way.  Only conviction by the Holy Spirit and their submission to that conviction will result in the restoration that you seek.  So what can you do?  Well …. It’s simple really … show them Jesus. 

(Romans 12:17-21) “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

This is not a natural response but a supernatural one.  The natural response is to return evil for evil.  People who care about you may give you a number of reasons why you should not return good for the evil they have done.  When anyone gives us advice in times like this, we must always look to the Word to see what God has to say about it.  And don’t expect your flesh – your old nature – to like it.  Times like this are a test .. that’s right – a test of your new nature.  Responding by faith with obedience to the Word of God requires that we see “the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1) And in doing so you bring glory to God and lift up Jesus to all those around you. Now what could be better than that? Nothing – that’s what!

How To Overcome The Daily Struggles In Life

My Utmost For His Highest 

We…plead with you not to receive the grace of God in vain. —2 Corinthians 6:1

{CHAMBERS} “The grace you had yesterday will not be sufficient for today. Grace is the overflowing favor of God, and you can always count on it being available to draw upon as needed. “…in much patience, in tribulations, in needs, in distresses”— that is where our patience is tested (2 Corinthians 6:4). Are you failing to rely on the grace of God there? […] We tend to make prayer the preparation for our service, yet it is never that in the Bible. Prayer is the practice of drawing on the grace of God. Don’t say, “I will endure this until I can get away and pray.” Pray now — draw on the grace of God in your moment of need. Prayer is the most normal and useful thing; it is not simply a reflex action of your devotion to God. We are very slow to learn to draw on God’s grace through prayer.”

{ELGIN} Living your new life in Christ requires constant focus on the One who has given you that new life.  (2 Corinthians 4:16-18) “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” The fact is that most of us spend very little time each day focused on our spiritual nature – the unseen – the eternal.  Instead we are consumed with the natural life and all of the challenges it brings.  Relying on and drawing on the grace of God to endure and prosper in a sin-sick world.  Listen – there are not “magic words” that you can keep in your pocket until the time of trouble comes.  Living a successful life – success from the Father’s perspective – meaning that you are living the natural life in the confidence that comes from making your spiritual life and relationship with the Father through the Son by faith in the power of the Spirit and His Word. 

(Joshua 1:8-9) “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

These are the words spoken by God to Joshua when Joshua was established as the leader who would take the nation of Israel into the promised land.  Recall that Joshua and Caleb were the only men among the 12 spies who were sent into the land by Moses.  The only two who saw the natural from God’s perspective. Although they saw giants like the others had – they saw the power of God as greater.  Like David – when he confronted Goliath.  All three saw the world in the context of who God is.  And the same is true for us.  Is your heart totally devoted to God? Only you can answer that question.  It should be – it is what God desires – even commands.  And it is for your own good and for God’s glory.

What To Do When Sorrow Finds You And Then What To Do Afterward?

My Utmost For His Highest 

…what shall I say? "Father, save Me from this hour"? But for this purpose I came to this hour. "Father, glorify Your name." —John 12:27-28

{CHAMBERS} “As a saint of God, my attitude toward sorrow and difficulty should not be to ask that they be prevented, but to ask that God protect me so that I may remain what He created me to be, in spite of all my fires of sorrow. Our Lord received Himself, accepting His position and realizing His purpose, in the midst of the fire of sorrow. He was saved not from the hour, but out of the hour. We say that there ought to be no sorrow, but there is sorrow, and we have to accept and receive ourselves in its fires. […] Sorrow is one of the biggest facts in life, and there is no use in saying it should not be. Sin, sorrow, and suffering are, and it is not for us to say that God has made a mistake in allowing them.[…] You can always recognize who has been through the fires of sorrow and received himself, and you know that you can go to him in your moment of trouble and find that he has plenty of time for you. […] If you will receive yourself in the fires of sorrow, God will make you nourishment for other people.”

{ELGIN} I do not find it strange but marvelous that I can have a discussion or some event will occur in my life and the very next morning the devotion addresses what happened only yesterday. My wife and I had a lengthy discussion about sorrow, how people respond to it, and what, if any, good can come from it.  For the most part, people focus on the here and now – their mortal lives and put everything that happens in that context.  Their natural life had primacy over any and all other considerations.  What happens to them, or doesn’t, shapes their attitude toward others and their confidence in themselves.

The thing is … that is not the right view of life.  For those who are not “born again by the Spirit” they have no choice really.  There is nothing or no One that they can turn to for answers, for relief. They must trust in mere mortals for help.  But, for those who have been “born again” there is another road to be taken. 

So there are really two aspects to sorrow in this life.  First – what you should do when it happens to you.  Second – what you should do when it happens to others. When it happens to you - The Apostle Paul wrote -

(Philippians 4:4-7) “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!  Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Rejoicing always – not being anxious – experiencing a peace that transcends human understanding – peace in the midst of turmoil – that has a supernatural root – born out faith and experienced by the power of the Spirit that rest in the heart of every Christian.  It is God’s intent that we, as Christians, would have these abilities – that the fruit – the result of living a life submitted to the Spirit of God – would be evidenced in our lives no matter what happens in our lives.  What is out of the reach for the natural man is fully within the grasp of the “super-natural” man.  The man or woman who is saved by the sacrifice of Jesus through faith and trusts in the Lord as a way of life – their new life.

So what do you do with all of that pain – hurt that life brings your way? Pastor Rick Warren said “God never wastes a hurt”

Paul also wrote – (2 Corinthians 1:3-5) “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.”

Just as God provided strength to endure and overcome, He expects us, and has equipped us, to embrace the comfort we found in Him and use it to encourage others.  Not to “fix” them, but to love them.  Experiencing hardship increases my compassion for others.  I don’t seek hardships and disappointments out .. they will surely find me.  But I don’t have to let them break me.  Not with God on my side. And neither do you my friend.

What Will You Have To Offer When You Finally Stand Before Jesus?

My Utmost For His Highest 

With what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. —Matthew 7:2

{CHAMBERS} “This statement is not some haphazard theory, but it is an eternal law of God. Whatever judgment you give will be the very way you are judged. […] Romans 2:1 applies it in even a more definite way by saying that the one who criticizes another is guilty of the very same thing. God looks not only at the act itself, but also at the possibility of committing it, which He sees by looking at our hearts. To begin with, we do not believe the statements of the Bible. For instance, do we really believe the statement that says we criticize in others the very things we are guilty of ourselves? The reason we see hypocrisy, deceit, and a lack of genuineness in others is that they are all in our own hearts. The greatest characteristic of a saint is humility, as evidenced by being able to say honestly and humbly, “Yes, all those, as well as other evils, would have been exhibited in me if it were not for the grace of God. Therefore, I have no right to judge.””

{ELGIN} Imagine, if you will, standing before Jesus.  Giving an account for your life as a Christian – and all Christians will.  That time will not be about forgiveness of sins .. Our salvation will not be at stake.  Would it make any sense to say that your sins are forgiven but for only as long as you are living this mortal life, but then – whoa baby (something my mom used to say) – wait until you stand before Jesus .. He is going to bring it all up and then you are going to get hammered for all of the sins you committed after you were born again?  Think about it.  That contradicts what the Bible says about salvation, forgiveness, redemption … It’s not about me … it’s about Jesus .. it’s about grace.

(Romans 8:1-4) “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.”

But, like the man who hid his one talent … we will give an account for what we have done with what He has given ..  a glorious salvation – inhabited by His Spirit – imbued with specific spiritual gifts for the purpose of edifying the Body of Christ and lifting the name of Jesus up to the world.   When we stand before Jesus what will we have to offer - “silver, gold and precious stones” or “wood, hay and stubble”? I think that at that moment – when the world is not longer exerting its influence on us – the only thing we will want to hear is “Well done my good and faithful servant!”  But the truth is that many will be – no less saved – but much more aware that they squandered the opportunity and their God-given purpose.  Much of the reason why Christians are carnal is because they are ignorant of who they are in Christ and immersed in the pursuit of the pleasures of this world. But one day, there will be deep regret in the hearts of many saints. Please don’t let one of them be you!

Your Life Will Shout Out How Much You Really Want To Be Like Jesus

My Utmost For His Highest 

You are…a royal priesthood… —1 Peter 2:9

{CHAMBERS} “By what right have we become “a royal priesthood”? It is by the right of the atonement by the Cross of Christ that this has been accomplished. Are we prepared to purposely disregard ourselves and to launch out into the priestly work of prayer? […] Until we get into this right and proper relationship with God, it is simply a case of our “hanging on by the skin of our teeth,” although we say, “What a wonderful victory I have!” Yet there is nothing at all in that which indicates the miracle of redemption. […] How long is it going to take God to free us from the unhealthy habit of thinking only about ourselves? We must get to the point of being sick to death of ourselves, until there is no longer any surprise at anything God might tell us about ourselves[…] There is only one place where we are right with God, and that is in Christ Jesus. Once we are there, we have to pour out our lives for all we are worth in this ministry of the inner life.”

{ELGIN} If the Father’s intent is that we be conformed to the image of His Son (Romans 8:29) – well what exactly is that.  Jesus was and the is the fulfillment of everything that the Temple represented – He is the sacrificial offering (John 1:29) – He is the Curtain (Matthew 27:50-51) – He is the High Priest (Hebrews 4:14) – and He is the obedient son doing the will of the Father (John 4:34). (Galatians 2:20) “I am crucified with Christ – nevertheless I live, yet not I but Christ lives in me.  And the life that I now live, I live by faith in the Son who loved me and gave himself up for me.” 

Being conformed does not mean that we look different on the outside – but that we are transformed on the inside – which – by the way – results in a transformation on the outside.  When the Bible says that we are a royal priesthood – it’s similar to the Tribe of Levi who were priests … Jesus is the firstborn among many brothers . (Romans 8:29-30)  “For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.” 

Paul said that we are to offer ourselves as living sacrifices (Romans 12:1,2).  Jesus said “No greater love has one man than this, than to lay down his life for His friends. (John 15:13) He also said the second greatest commandment was to “love you neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39) That does not mean to merely get along – it means to Agape them – Like Jesus asked Peter – Do you love Me? (John 21:17)  Asking – “will you lay down your life for Me?”

Jesus told the parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14-30).  The first man was given one talent (a talent is a unit of measure – about 75lbs – for precious metals like gold and silver).  The man took it and buried it when he was given it with the intent that he would multiply it.  That is what so many do with their faith.  They hide it .. don’t let it follow its natural course which is to multiply itself. 

So – you knew this was coming! – how are you doing with your talent? Have you settled in to who you are in Christ and who are to be to the world you live in?  Or did you stick all that in the ground and press on with life the best you can. Are you being transformed on the inside and is it obvious on the outside?  I called a plumber the other day to ask him to do some work on a house we are restoring in Houston.  When he is with me – he talks about the Lord – being a Christian – well, he answered the phone and assumed I was someone else.  He started ranting with a heavy sprinkling of expletives.  I was finally able to interrupt his rant to tell him that I was Charley with Pathfinder. He realized I was not who he thought I was and his countenance changed immediately.  “Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45) Is it evident to people you don’t know or who are not Christians that you are a Christian?    How would you answer the Jesus question “Do You Love Me?” Something to think about .. and perhaps talk about with the Lord.

Do You Practice Foxhole Religion - Don't Make Empty Promises To God

My Utmost For His Highest 

The Lord restored Job’s losses when he prayed for his friends. —Job 42:10

{CHAMBERS} “A pitiful, sickly, and self-centered kind of prayer and a determined effort and selfish desire to be right with God are never found in the New Testament. The fact that I am trying to be right with God is actually a sign that I am rebelling against the atonement by the Cross of Christ. I pray, “Lord, I will purify my heart if You will answer my prayer— I will walk rightly before You if You will help me.” But I cannot make myself right with God; I cannot make my life perfect. I can only be right with God if I accept the atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ as an absolute gift. […] I must leave myself completely alone in His hands, and then I can begin to pour my life out in the priestly work of intercession. […] “The Lord restored Job’s losses when he prayed for his friends.” As a saved soul, the real business of your life is intercessory prayer. Whatever circumstances God may place you in, always pray immediately that His atonement may be recognized and as fully understood in the lives of others as it has been in yours. Pray for your friends now, and pray for those with whom you come in contact now.”

{ELGIN} Foxhole religion. If you were ever in the military in a war you know what that is.  It’s when you are afraid .. in mortal danger ..  and you make a promise to God. “God if you will spare me I promise to be good.”  We find ourselves in a jam and we are looking for a way out.  A prayer of the flesh – devoid of any spiritual context – and what happens when you are spared?  The pray fades in your memory.  So often we treat prayer like a 911 call.  “I have an emergency and need to be rescued! Lord save me!” or perhaps “Lord restore what I have lost!”  Why? Because my trust and confidence was in that which was lost and not in the One to Whom I am praying.

(James 4:2-3) “You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.”

The New Testament is replete with admonitions to distance yourself from the world and the things of the world .. to trust God .. to not worry .. but we do anyway.  What the Bible says to do .. you cannot apart from Christ in you.  “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”  God is not our first thought – He is our afterthought?   Sound harsh?  Listen – it is a problem that every Christian must contend with.  Jesus said the greatest commandment was to love God – the Father – with all of your being.  That does not leave much room for anything else.  But – out of that love will flow everything else.  Jesus said His kingdom was not of this world. God is interested in our spiritual success and obedience not in our earthly affluence.  Too many have compromised their faith because of the things of this world.  Like the song of the sirens, you will be lured into the rocks resulting in spiritual impotence.  Be careful my friend.  Wanting to not be like that will not make it so … that will happen when you commit your heart to God and pursue Him.  Think about it.

If You Really Love Jesus - You Need To Grow Up

My Utmost For His Highest 

…do you love Me?…Tend My sheep. —John 21:16

{CHAMBERS} “Jesus did not say to make converts to your way of thinking, but He said to look after His sheep, to see that they get nourished in the knowledge of Him. We consider what we do in the way of Christian work as service, yet Jesus Christ calls service to be what we are to Him, not what we do for Him. Discipleship is based solely on devotion to Jesus Christ, not on following after a particular belief or doctrine. “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate…, he cannot be My disciple” (Luke 14:26). In this verse, there is no argument and no pressure from Jesus to follow Him; He is simply saying, in effect, “If you want to be My disciple, you must be devoted solely to Me.” […] People do not really want to be devoted to Jesus, but only to the cause He started. Jesus Christ is deeply offensive to the educated minds of today, to those who only want Him to be their Friend, and who are unwilling to accept Him in any other way. Our Lord’s primary obedience was to the will of His Father, not to the needs of people— the saving of people was the natural outcome of His obedience to the Father. […] if I love Jesus Christ personally and passionately, I can serve humanity, even though people may treat me like a “doormat.” The secret of a disciple’s life is devotion to Jesus Christ, and the characteristic of that life is its seeming insignificance and its meekness. Yet it is like a grain of wheat that “falls into the ground and dies”— it will spring up and change the entire landscape (John 12:24).

{ELGIN}  If you love God then you will love people. (Matthew 22:37-39)  If you are Jesus’ disciple you will do what He did. (John 14:15) He obeyed the will of the Father and the world was blessed. (John 6:38) If you live by faith and not just a religious philosophy then , good works will flow naturally from you. (James 2:18)

It’s not uncommon for people to praise me for what I do.  When I tell them “Give the credit to God.” They look at me like it is feigned humility.  I know that I can not take credit for anything.  God has given me everything .. every ability ..He formed me (Psalm 139:13)  If I can take credit for anything it is offering my life to Him .. that is an act of my will (Romans 12:1-2) You may be born again but the life that follows is one of willful obedience to the Father or willful obedience to the old nature, which is to say willful disobedience to the Father.  The real tragedy is convincing yourself that you are doing the former when you are really doing the latter. 

(2 Timothy 3:1-5) “But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.”  Does that sound like the culture in this country?  The American Christian culture?  You say “That is NOT me!” I say “Praise the Lord!” It is a description of the carnal Christian. 

(1 Corinthians 3:1-3) “And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual people but as to carnal, as to babes in Christ. I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able to receive it, and even now you are still not able; for you are still carnal. For where there are envy, strife, and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like mere men?” Pastor Brian Lambert, in his sermon last Sunday, addressed three types of Christians – Infants who know they believe in Jesus and are saved but have trouble applying the Word to their lives; Adolescents who are focused on taking in the Word and applying it to their lives, and Mature Adults who know Jesus and are making Him known as they live lives obedient to the will of the Father.  I am not judging anyone, but am encouraging you … no matter at what stage of Christian development you are … to never be satisfied but pursue God to your last day on this Earth.  The fact is, many of us just need to Grow Up! That should be the desire of your heart. To be found faithful on the day you meet Jesus face to face … either in Heaven or when He returns.